hi. how's it been? lovely saturday isnt it? i think so too.

im listening to this song called Foolish and thats how im feeling. foolish. here i am, trying to clean up my room.

who am i kidding?? hahahhaha. lelaa? clean up her room? look at me. im blogging instead.

its one of those days.. you know?

you're in your room, on your bed, staring at the ceiling with the radio blasting on, drowning everyone else's voices and making everyone wanna murder you.. basically just minding your own business.

then suddenly you're up. you just have the most crazy idea. clean up the room! ah! its better than just pretending to be doing something.

..okiee.. maybe only i do that. god knows my room needs a lot of cleaning, and a lot of tidying up..

i need to occupy myself from the craziness thats happening lately anyway.

that was about 12 hours ago. im still not done yet. hahah. its not even anywhere near done!! i can still blog, for crying out loud..(:

the bugger behind the blogger: lelaa ismail. (sorry, dad. hahah..)

its interesting what you can find in your own room.... sigh.. im surrounded with old magazines, old textbooks, old exam papers which i had stuffed deeep inside the drawers.. but most interesting: my old journals..(:

you see, i dont know if i should throw them, or keep them. they're just so precious to me~ for some weird reasons..

mom says whats the use holding on to it? memories should all be inside your head, and your heart. yea well truee..

but wouldn it be cool 20 years down the road and you find yourself flipping thorugh your disgusting journals or exercise books or even the school's parentline. haha.

yea. you know what? i am a sentimental freak. and i dont see the problem with that(:

do you know what else i found? my sketches, my short stories, my attempt-at poetries and whatnots......aaahh~ id die if anyone had their filthy hands on them.. blushh.

you know why its scary for me to clean up my room? because lina's not here to help me, thats why. she's the one who knows where the dictionaries, where the cd album without the cd goes etc. yea. shes the little miss organized.

i, little miss perfectionist. but im a different sort. im a perfectionist who believes nothing is perfect. so..thats why i cant seem to get anything done.

hahahhaha i thuuuuck!!!!!

lina's away for some camp and she'll be back on monday. .....i think i can handle it. being with these piles of papers and books for another 2 nights.

but i doubt my mom can. i dont see her problem. shes not the one who has to sleep with them.

why cant she help me anyway? "i didnt ask you to clean up your room," she reasoned. thats a way of saying: "im the laziest mother on the face of this universe and you cannot do anything about it."

haha i wouldnt dare to promise that i wont sleep until my room's neat again. hahha. naaahh. wouldn wanna risk it. hahaa.

i think ill be sleeping on the couch tonight.

"the singapore poly experience thing was a total wombat by the way. waste of money, buckeroos, and time.

.....okie i made that up. the wombat thing. hah.

but really. i thought we would be, you know, attending real poly lectures, not just some introduction about the courses..

yea so we need to know what its all about first before we start anything. i know that. but have it ever occured to them that maybe we already knew?

..i thought so.

even the buffet sucks. ..i can never look at sushi the same again..... -shudders. imagine..soggy bread instead of rice. like, what the?

the only fun bit about the whole thing is.. uh.... i only had fun when the.. uhh... irghh. i didnt have fun, alright?

fun was when hannan texted me in the middle of the boring speeches and made me laugh. hahhahah.. hannan's da man~

pizza versus prata.. now yoda versus madonna? gosh..we're lame(:

he perked me up and i wanna thank him sincerely from the bottom of my butt. i would have died there in the convention hall.

monster-in-law made me laugh out loud and we actually sat at some else's seats and they were like, "eh?" and we were like, "huh?" and then "oh!!" and then rushed to our actual seat which was kindar silly but it made me laugh.

and seeing sriee after so long was refreshing.. hahha. and ken complimented my butt which was awkward but anything else is better than the misery and the emptiness i was experiencing.. hated it so."

that was.. ermm. 3 days ago. i blgged but didnt get to publish it because somehow the entry that day was.. all wrong. i dont know.

ive got an extract from it and put it here. so. yup. shruggs.

maybe i should go back to my cleaning yer? or i can just, you know, lock the door and pretend nothing happened and move in my granpar's room. they dont use it much anyway. about my school books and stuff, ill worry about that tomorrow.

night night! little miss perfectionist-big pfft-procrastinator-more-like signing off; lelaa ismail (ive said sorry, havent i, dad?)